Oct. 3rd, 2023

tiger_moran: (Default)
Another little piece of my childhood seems to have gone now, they're demolishing what was last a tanning salon but when I was a kid it was a newsagents, I used to get my pony magazines from there (ah remember the days when pony magazines were good and not obsessed with 'matchy matchy sets' and youtube 'celebrities' which is all Pony magazine now seems to be obsessed with. Meanwhile all the rest of the pony magazines seem to have gone under long ago), I used to go there to buy sweets or ice creams sometimes. 
Now it's been knocked down to turn it into flats or something.

So much has gone and will never be again and it just... hurts. This longing for things that can and will never be again, it hurts so much. 
Sometimes we walk along the tramline which is OK I guess and my dog likes watching the trams, but it's just a tarmac path now and I miss the old railway line and how beautiful and green that was. And I miss it being an actual railway line even though I didn't get to ever see that but I would so love to see the old diesels running along there or even the steam trains but I'll never get to see that and what makes it worse really is the tramline looks exactly like a railway line, the tracks look the same, which kind of makes it hurt even more, the fact that it looks so much like it but it just... isn't (it isn't actually the same line, the train would have gone up on an embankment but they ripped all that out to make the tramline). 

It's just like... the older I get the more outcast I become, the more I get left behind, and the more it hurts that so, so much of what I loved or recognised has gone and been torn up, torn down, replaced with soulless things I don't give a shit about. It's like technology too, I have absolutely been left behind because of this obsession now with mobile phones, smart phones, shit like facebook and twitter, all of that crap, and that's just going to get worse and worse and it's certainly never going to get any better. I hate being alive in this time, I hate it.

May 2025

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